i was never happy.

that burst of emotions made me completely breakdown.
completely into smithereens.
i have completely lost every hope.
every light i had in me.
all the emotions, frustrations and problems.
i held it in me.
just like a balloon.
and when it can no longer hold on anymore.
it bursts.
just like me. i have burst.
i can feel every single happiness slowly drain away from my body.

我真的崩溃了...

i envy you. you have someone to share your problems.
and i have no one to rely on, but myself.
i really envy boys. to be so ignorant at times.
and i can only blame myself for being so so sensitive.

i feel so lifeless now.